Learn & Move on or Regret & Stagnate!

There are certain obvious benefits of problems. Sounds ironic? Let’s explore. After going through life’s rigmarole, it suddenly dawned on me with utmost clarity as to how much I have benefited with all the problems that I have faced so far.

One of the beliefs of excellence in NLP states that every problem has a solution. To expand on it, there are at least 3 things that happen when we face a problem. One – we find ways to solve it. Two – if don’t come close to solving a problem, we find creative ways to work around it. Three – if both of the above don’t happen – we LEARN something valuable. Think of the problem that you may have faced and check which of the three happened. It does ring a bell, doesn’t it? Now there’s a difference between imaginary problems and real problems. When we imagine problems, what we become good at is ‘worrying’. When we face real problems, what we become good at is ‘solving’. (And you know which is empowering).

It’s true though that at the time of the problem, I may not have been this wise to see the bright side of things. But over a period of time, whenever I revisited a problem time, I realized I have grown so much as a person and learnt so much from it. As a result, I now start thinking what learning could this experience be offering me, at the outset. Thinking this way has helped me stay calm and relaxed in troubled times. Also, the positive belief that something good always comes out of everything enables me to stay solution focused and gives greater confidence to deal with the situation at hand.

One classic example is Phil Hansen, a great artist whose uniqueness was to draw huge portraits with a combination of dots (pointillist drawings, as it is called). He developed a nervous disorder that left his hand with a permanent shake. Doctors said he could never draw a straight line again. Phil was initially disheartened. But later, worked around and decided that if not a straight line, he will draw with crooked lines itself. And he is back to drawing his usual magnificent art works. Take a look for yourself by clicking here.

When we look back a problem, we could do two things – reflect or regret. Reflecting is to healthily look at it and see what we learnt from it and move ahead. Regret is if we constantly feel bad about something that has already happened and either blame ourselves or others for it. This may not be a useful strategy as it only unlocks further un-resourceful states. The more we dwell on our misfortunes, the greater is their effect.

Look around you and look within you – just see the sheer magic of wonders that we create during problem times. Problems often bring out the best in us. So worry not of a problem that’s here, for it is this problem that’ll get you there, where you always want to be.